Ideal Self

Today in my Toastmasters group, we did an interesting little exercise. We were told to write down three things: your favourite animal, your favourite colour and your favourite body of water. Then, we were told to write down 5 or 6 characteristics or things that each item reminded us of.

Apparently the first item - the animal - is a representation of your ideal self.

This is what I wrote:

Cat - cute, sloth-like/lazy, life of leisure, liked by people, vain, demanding and playful.

I'm not sure my ideal self is vain, lazy and demanding! If this is a glimpse into my subconscious, I'm in big trouble.

The second item - your favourite colour - was supposed to be a representation of how you want others to see you. I wrote:

Green - peaceful, cool, calm, summer, tropical.

That works. I'm happy with that. A bit of a contrast from my "ideal self." Seems as if I'm living a bit of a dual-life.

The third thing - the body of water - was supposed to represent how you act intimately. This was a weird one. I wrote:

Lake Huron - beautiful, fun, home, campfires, partying, late nights, drinking, my parents boat.

Uh.... sounds scandolous. I am really not sure how credible and accurate this personality test was!

Spontaneous Dance

I’ve always wanted to get caught up in one of those moments they often have in movies where people just spontaneously break into a dance and people just join in seeming to already know the moves like its common knowledge. A lifelong dream of mine really.

For example, remember the part near the end of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off where he co-opts that parade, and out of nowhere, people are doing an elaborate song and dance in the street?

Or, how about the ending of a random episode of The Drew Carey Show where there’s an out-of-nowhere dance battle between The Rocky Horror Picture Show and Priscilla, Queen of the Desert?

And there’s this one that I stumbled upon last weekend. In that crappy movie 13 Going on 30 (only slightly redeemed due to this 80’s inspired spontaneous dance), Jennifer Garner's character needs to get a dull party going so she asks the DJ to turn on MJ’s Thriller and before you know it, the entire party is doing the Thriller dance...because people just know these things.

Or what about the end of the movie Slumdog Millionaire? That was a good one!

Recently, someone also sent me this one. It’s from Central Station in Antwerp Belgium where more than 200 dancers danced to “Do Re Mi” from The Sound of Music. Man, if I had of been there… I totally would have tried to join in.

One day, I hope to stumble upon a spontaneous dance - one that I can join in because I'll just instincively know the moves… because you know, that’s how these things happen, right? A girl can dream…

Observations

Here are some random things I have learned about my new job this week:

- You are not allowed to view the calendar by double clicking the clock. I didn't realize how often I did this until I got a mean little message that told me I did not have the "rights" to make changes to the date and time. I don't want to make changes! I just want to SEE the calendar!

- No personalization of your computer allowed. I'm a photographer in my spare time and as a result I like to set my desktop photo to some pretty and seasonal picture I took myself. No can do sadly.

- The door. Once you swipe your badge, push IN first, then pull. I looked like a big dummy yanking on the door convinced my security badge didn't work

- Badge access at the main entry: hold, don't swipe your badge over the reader. Otherwise, you will never escape and will inevitably hold up a line of people forming behind you. Zero chance of not standing out as "the new girl" in this situation.

- Coffee in the kitchen. Nope. But you do have three places to buy your own. Looks like it's green tea for me!

- My phone was apparently previously associated with some random test account and as a result, I get about 10 calls a day from someone trying to verify something I don't understand. Hopefully these will stop soon.

Yes, the first week is all about learning - everything form my day to day responsibilities to how to open the door :) So far, so good.

Something new

I'm pretty averse to change. Even if my current situation is bad, I'm likely to hesitate about making a change. Even if I am successful in making the change, I somehow start coming up with a million reasons why the previous situation wasn't that bad. It's truly ridiculous behaviour. Very counter-productive. I think its because I'm a Libra. I'm too easily able to weigh pros and cons of situations which is great for being able to sympathize with people and see things from a variety of perspectives, but its crappy for making decisions.

Anyways, I made a change recently: I'll be starting a new job tomorrow and I'm pretty excited. Although saying goodbye to the old job was actually a lot harder than I anticipated, I'm ready for a new challenge. I'm excited about new coworkers, new work and a new atmosphere.

After returning from a last minute, sun-drenched trip to the sunny south, I'm ready for the change. Tanned, relaxed, de-stressed. The #1 reason I know I've totally relaxed: I stopped biting my nails. I didn't really mean to. It just happened. I have tried countless times in the past to stop. I've been biting my nails for more than two decades and all of sudden, I just stopped. I've always attributed my nail biting to stress so I'm taking this sudden change of behaviour as pure, undeniable evidence that I am de-stressed.

Yup. I'm ready for change. Bring it on.

Music: The shorthand of emotion

When was the last time music gave you goosebumps? Me? Sunday afternoon. I went to see my friend Heather in her debut performance with a jazz and blues band called the Royal Jelly Orchestra. Heather was absolutley incredible. Her voice is so soulful and effortless and her stage presence is fabulous. Absolute joy to listen to.

Couple that with some of the most talented, mind blowingly awesome musicians I have ever seen and my afternoon was complete. Absolutley tremendous sax players, a trumpet player who's amazing performance couldn't help but put a smile on your face and a pianist that rivalled any piano playing I have ever seen. One woman sang Bridge Over Troubled Water with a bass player as her only accompaniment. It was deeply moving. Her voice filled the playhouse and literally gave me goosebumps. She didn't even need a microphone.

I left smiling with this feeling of pride for my friend and for all the other people I know who are so musically talented. I love being a part of their shows, even if it is just as an adoring fan. I am just so entertained by musical talent and live performance.

Heather is particularly amazing. Having only been actively singing for three years, she fit right in with a band that contains several people who have been singing and playing jazz and blues for their entire professional careers. She truly is a natural and I'm so happy to see that she's found her "calling" in life. I think I felt the same level of happiness as her beaming mom who made the 5 hour trek to Cobourg to surprise her daughter and watch the show.

All this talent around me makes me sad I can't sing. I should be able to. I've lamented this fact a million times. My mom sings. My Dad is a great guitar player. People actually pay to hear them play together! But it's okay. I will not be sad. No, I'll live vicariously through the musical escapades of my friends and, until the next show, I'll simply continue singing badly to myself in my car.

Check out some of Heather's tunes here.

Or check out the Royal Jelly Orchestra here.

The more money I raise, the faster I'll run!

In January, I made some resolutions; or rather some 2009 goals. Some ambitious. Some very realistic. One of those goals was to sign up for and complete a 10km race.

Well, I've done it. I will participating in the 2009 David Bloom Memorial Brampton Spring Sprint and will be running a 10km race on May 3. The event is in memory of David Bloom who is the brother of my friend and former coworker, Richard Bloom. I feel happy that I can accomplish my goal and do something for a good cause that has meaning for me.

I have a modest fundraising goal of $500 so hopefully I can meet it. Evidently, there is no punishment for not meeting your goal, which takes the pressure off...unlike the Walk to End Breast Cancer that apparently holds you personally accountable for the $2,000 fundraising minimum. Likewise, no one will physically abuse or verbally harass me if I can't run all the way to the finish line (however, I'm determined to run 10km in under an hour) and I get a free tshirt!

For all my loyal blog readers (ie: Tina and April), maybe you could toss a couple bucks my way. If I meet my goal, I'll sprint the full 10km. Okay, that's a lie. I will however, jog enthusiastically. :)

You can find my donation page here

I looked for a picture that illustrated my fierce athleticism and am hoping my selection helps encourage more donations.

Luck o' the Irish

St. Patrick's Day is always fun. Even if it's on a Tuesday. I spent the day yesterday, working from home with the windows open enjoying the smell of Spring air come through my windows.

I played my "Irish Songs" playlist which consists of several classics including The Irish Drinking Song and basically anything by The Pogues. I am sure I've never understood a full sentence the Pogues have ever sang, but man, there is nothing quite like a fun Irish tune to make you want to get up, dance and grab a green pint. Even if it is Tuesday...and you're not Irish...

Highlight of the day included meeting a real, live leprechaun. Picture coming soon...

Signs

I finally finished Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell. Tremendous book. I highly reccommend it. It really shed some light on the nature of success and how it's really not all grit, personal effort, talent and ambition. Sure, that's part of it, but success is really more about a series of random events and opportunities; about being in the right place at the right time. Despite the fact that I'm more of a fluffy fiction reader, I found this book fascinating.

Anyways, I was on the hunt last night for something new to read and I have had this random Ian Rankin novel called Knots and Crosses beside my bed since Christmas. Graham got it in a case of specialty beer he received as a Christmas present (Whatever happened to tshirt freebies?) I read the back of the book and thought skeptically: "This looks kind of lame. I really don't know if I want to read it." I flipped the book open to a random page and it happened to be the author's dedication. It said:

"To Miranda. Without whom, nothing is worth finishing."

I don't really think I have a choice about reading this book now. Hope its a good read!

Speaking of signs, you know how sometimes it seems like songs on the radio seem to align perfectly with your feelings? That old song "Switchin' to Glide" by The Kings came on and the lyric: "Nothing matters but the weekend... from a Tuesday point of view," really hit home with me today. It's not even noon and I've drifted off into weekend day dreaming several times today already. Come on Friday!

Toastmasters: An Obituary

I have been the President of my company's Toastmasters Club for more than a year. I’ve loved the club, the people and being the leader and mentor for this group of inspiring, determined people.

That’s why it pains me to say that it looks as if our Club is going to have to close its doors. Annual fees have come due and a large majority of our members will not renew.

Due to the state of the company, they will not longer be paying for training and development costs for their employees and people are unwilling to pay for their club fees out of their own pockets. And sadly, the club has been deteriorating for some time. Membership is decreasing as layoffs increase. Attendance is down as people are overloaded with work and participation is limited because people simply can’t focus on personal development in a company that doesn’t make it a priority.

Toastmasters is far from synonymous with cool. It’s generally a club of somewhat socially awkward, introverted folks petrified of public speaking. I read that public speaking is the world’s greatest fear, ranking higher even than things like death by fire or plane crashes.

Coolness aside, it truly is one of the most effective forums I’ve seen to help people come out of their shells and become more confident speakers and communicators. I could go on for pages about the benefits of this club. The things I have learned as both a member and the President have been absolutely invaluable.

That is why I’m sad to see it fall apart in front of me despite my best efforts.

All is not lost of course. Toastmasters is well-known around the world and the GTA alone has more than 50 different clubs. I’ll transfer my membership to somewhere new but I’ll always feel a little sad about this Club that failed… with me at the helm.

Shameless Self Promotion

Anyone who knows me knows I love the spotlight. So when a former coworker asked if I would be in some promotional videos for the Habitat for Humanity Women Build Project how could I refuse? Come to the studio? Have my makeup done? Read a script from a teleprompter and hob knob with B-list Canadian celebrities?! You had me at studio.


While filming, I got to meet supermodel Monika Schnarr. She is one tall lady! Note the photo. I stood with four inch heels on a box and was still shorter than her! Alas, my dreams of modeling will never come to fruition.

After waiting weeks and weeks for the volunteer editing team to complete their magic, these are the final videos:

Video One

and...

Video Two

Okay, so I'm only in each one for a few seconds but it was such fun. I love being in the studio. Maybe I missed my calling in broadcast. ;)

National Do Over Day

According to my radio, today is National Do Over Day.

Apparently, today is the day where every Canadian gets a chance "to do over anything good to do with love, family, sensuality, travel, social life, etc., or on the darker side, career-ending blunders, socially suicidal moves, immoral or criminal acts or pretty much anything falling under the heading 'regrettable.'

Here's my list...

Things I'd do differently:
- My last job interview for the job I didn't get
- End my last relationship sooner
- Go on exchange in highschool
- Been in french immersion in school
- Giving my number to a jerk at Rob's party
- Made more lasting friendships in university
- Not dye my hair strawberry blonde in Grade 9 (Eeek!)

Good experiences I'd like to relive:
- The summer of 2006
- Any trip with Graham
- My last day of highschool
- That dinner at the Greek a la carte restaurant in Dominican Republic
- My first drive alone after getting my license
- Walking out of my final university exam
- The Green Day concert
- Summer camping trips with Tina and my Dad
- New Years Eve 1999

"Smile a Little!"

I found out today that I didn't get a job I had three interviews for. I am disappointed. I put a lot of effort into that process. Four weeks total and countless hours studying relevant industry news and travelling to and from the office for interviews. I put my whole heart into it and it sucks that wasn't enough.

So, I'm back out there and today I met a nice new contact from a downtown law firm. The meeting went well so I'm not totally sure why I was walking home from the subway with a scowl on my face. I think I was just deep in thought - both about what I still had to do for my current job and brooding (just a little) that I didn't get the job I interviewed for.

So as I walked down my street with downcast eyes, a furrowed brow and pursed lips, a total stranger passing by me in the opposite direction literally grabbed my arm, looked at me and said, "Smile a little!" and kept walking in the other direction.

I found the whole thing so amusing I did smile. And I smiled all the rest of the way home. :)

Roller Derby, Anyone?

On Monday night, I went skating at the outdoor rink down at the harbourfront. This was my first skate of 2009 and it was glorious. I love that no matter how long its been since the last time I laced up my hockey skates and hit the ice, I always seem to be at the same skill level. I had a great time. I miss skating. So as I was whizzing around the ice, enjoying all the newbie skaters wobble around in their rental skates, I was stopped by a stranger wanting to know how long I'd been skating for. We started up a little conversation and as it turns out, she's a player on the Toronto Roller Derby team and suggested I try out.


Feeling pleased with myself, I said I'd check it out online. Here's what I found out:

- Roller Derby is a cool sport and one that is evidently making a comeback
- It is a sport played by women on those old school 4-wheel roller skates
- It is part show, part sport and all players have a wicked cool skater name like Candy Crossbones, Mala Justed and Audrey Hellborn.
- It is pretty violent! Lots of injuries!
- All the girls that play look TOUGH! I was scared of the pics
- They wear cool costumes... like leg warmers and short shorts that coordinate with their team name. Love!

I emailed the "fresh meat" coordinator that organizes the try-outs and she provided me with a ton of info. Although I am intrigued, I'm going to put it on the backburner for now. It was a big time committment and a lot of $$$ to buy the necessary equipment. So for now, while I'm focused on my career, I'll remain happy skating occassionally on the outdoor rinks in Toronto.

However, if I ever try out for this team, I'd need an entourage of cheering fans... and a really wicked derby girl name...

Did Anyone Notice...

...that I changed the title of this blog?

Interviews

There's nothing quite like a job interview to make you doubt yourself.

Interviewing has got to be right up there with one of my most hated activities. It ranks right alongside brushing snow off my car and cleaning my cat's litter. Necessary, but altogether unpleasant.

Why I Love Toronto

- Everything I need is within walking distance of my place
- I live across the street from a pub... three pubs actually
- One of the pubs is like Cheers and the waiters know me and Cathy. Yes, I am a bar local
- Most of my great friends live here (aside from Tina and April! *tear*)
- I can get ice cream at 11:00 pm from Baskin Robbins
- I never get hassled walking down Church Street - except for one time a woman hit on me... but it was just once in two years, so I can live with that
- I can always find somewhere cool to eat: Indian, Thai, Sushi, Korean, Mediterreanean, Greek, Portugese freakin' barbecue... it's all good. And it never ends.
- I've lived here for two years and am still discovering new things
- The TTC... even though it sucks, it takes me from A to B at a reasonable price. I also love that it's air-conditioned in the summer, and that it comes every 5 mins, even in off-times.
- Drinking beer at a Jays game in the summer
- Being an obnoxious fan at the Toronto FC
- Great concerts like... Spice Girls :)
- I love that after the concert you can go out and enjoy a smokey, greasy hot dog in the night air and laugh at crazy people on the streets. Love.
- The airport is closeby
- Multiculturalism
- I love that you can find fashionistas, indie kids, geeky scholars, and regular 9-5'ers all hanging out on the same patio
- Empanadas at Kensington Market
- I LOVE that singing guitar man at the Madison. I also love that the Madison is basically a big frat house, but with better booze.
- Shopping. Yonge and Bloor, The Eaton's Centre, Yorkville, Queen West, Sherway Gardens, Anything down Yonge Street. For a girl who was deprived of good shopping for all her teen years, this city is shopping heaven.

Yup. The T-dot is a good spot :)

Women: Wired for Marketing

I have been out networking like crazy in an attempt to better my work situation and I've discovered something interesting. So far, I have met:

- Four Cheif Marketing Officers from large Toronto law firms
- Three Senior VPs from local PR Agencies
- One Director of Communications for an Accounting firm
- One Corporate Communications Manager for a Pension Fund

What do they all have in common? They're ALL women. All nine of them.

Evidence from this recent article in the Top Tech News seems to agree. Apparently, women's brains make them better marketers.

So here's what happens. Every baby starts off with a woman's brain - according to this article. Then, in the case of boys, a surge of of fetal testosterone takes over the communication part of the brain. Meanwhile, the girl brain goes along developing which results in drastically different brain makeup from the boy. This is why, even from an early age, girls display greater sensitivity and far greater ability to understand others than boys. The article then goes on to explain then how this accounts for the fact that women make better marketers than men - we are genetically wired to be better at it.

Looks like I picked the right career!

No Excuse

I have been the worst kind of blogger there is. As I get more and more into the social media space with my job, I realize how much my absence on this blog has hurt it. I've killed it. Any readers I once had, have now likely jumped ship, on to bigger and better blogs with daily insights and witty commentary, complete with hundreds of readers and comments.

Sigh. I will get back into this. Perhaps as I embark on my next opportunity. I can have an official launch party for the new blog.

New name suggestions welcome.

Stay tuned.

People are Strange

People are strange. A story in the Globe and Mail today would certainly prove it. In fact, with this story, strange is the understatement of the century.

Scariest Story Ever

This is a news story about how a guy on a Greyhound bus to Winnepeg from Edmonton randomly attacked a total stranger sleeping beside him. He stabbed him repeatedly in the neck with a butcher knife and then... get this: sawed off his head! Horrified passengers fled off the bus and formed a defense line so police could come take him away. No one else was injured. Injured, no. But scarred and terrified, definitley. I can't even imagine.

I can really fool myself into thinking the world is a pretty reasonable place for the most part... but it's stories like this that just confirm to me that the world is insane. It also confirms that you should never trust anyone who wears sunglasses at night. Especially Corey Hart.

Buyer Beware

So for the first time since I was a kid, I sold items at a yardsale on the weekend. Graham's parents had a lot of furniture, electronics and a million odds and ends to sell so I joined in the fun to offload some of those random items taking up space in my tiny storage closet.

To my amazement, I didn't have that much to sell! I must have done a great job purging all my junk in my two moves in 2007.

Nevertheless, I did find some things to sell: an old desk chair, some computer speakers, a DVD system, and mountains and mountains of clothes.

Interestingly, the clothes sold extremely well. I wasn't even going to bring them, saying just a day before the sale: "No one buys clothes at a yardsale!" But apparently, at a $1 a peice, no one could resist that bargain. Graham's dad informed me that people look for yardsales in the Lawrence Park area assuming that quality is dictacted by location. However, I assure you, not a damn thing I was selling in that heap was quality!

Seeing the onslaught of bizarre bargain seekers buying up our stuff made me giggle with happiness. Nothing like the feeling of free money I thought! But Claire couldn't help but feel overwhelmed with some intense feeling of guilt. She seemed to think the whole process was sad somehow - like these people lack enough money to buy real things at stores or something. I had to disagree. I don't think people go to yardsales because they can't afford something better. It's the old cliche: one person's trash is another person's treasure.

I also couldn't help but laugh at the barrage of folks buying up all the electronics before 9 am. "Does this work?" a guy asked me about my old DVD system with 6 speaker surround sound. "Yes," I said. Now if he had of asked me, "Does this work well?" My answer probably would have been, "No, it's a peice of shit." If it worked well would I be selling it for $10 at a yardsale? Do I feel guilty? Not at all. Buyer beware I say.

All in all, I made $80. Better than the $0 I was going to make having brought it all to Value Village which was the initial plan. And rather than guilt, I feel some amount of pleasure knowing my things have gone to people who want them, rather than in the trash, contributing to a landfill which is likely where a lot of it would have ended up.